I watched TV yesterday, “Oh so the fuck what you say”, well let me illuminate that statement a little. I’m a firm believer, that there are a million things to do, and yet there is nothing to do. Television is a microcosm of that theory, hundreds of channels are made available for viewers pleasure, which they perilously navigate to hopefully become distracted (who needs to be informed) for at least 30 mins. If you are like the writer, you suffer from some yet undiagnosed syndrome that causes the remote to fuse to your right palm, and anger all life enclosed in the same room as you, with your amazingly perplexing miniscule attention span. Eventually I’ll find 2-3 programs worth watching, and will preceded to view, none of them, due to constant channel changing. My horrid affliction, coupled with a barren TV landscape, has caused me not to watch that much TV at all in the past few months, but for some reason when I assumed the Al Bundy position yesterday, and got comfortable. The first visual element I became exposed to was a commercial for the movie “Mr. and Ms. Smith” now anybody remotely close to me knows that Angelina Jolie has reigned on top of my WGILTF list for at least the past 6 years, so I’m mildly interested in almost anything she does. So as the commercial proceeds, all I really gather is, secret agents, guns, their married, more guns, there sexy, bigger guns, there are funny parts, and woah did you see Angelina assume that position cocking back that gun? Sometimes I think that the slave holder that I obtained a percentage of my background from was really named Analytical not Bradley, cause all I could think was, “So much for peaceful conflict resolution.” Society at large always preaches peaceful remedies to solve dilemmas, never lower your self to “their level” they say, respect others and all types of good stuff. Sad to say what I witnessed on TV might cause endless generations of Kindergarten teacher to feel their life’s work went for not, leading to coroner reports that expose 5 yr olds to the harsh realities of life early in the game. First Show: Real World- I vowed never to watch the Real World ever again last year. My reasons where two fold, one, I’ve lived in the “Real World” long enough to understand when someone lets you stay in a palatial urban apartment, gives you a b.s job in a great environment, and a all access pass to liquor and sex, it’s not really real. Secondly, black people on the show are always ho’s in my opinion. I’m not a gay basher by any stretch of the imagination, but if your only gonna have one gay person on the show and only one black guy on the show, why make them one in the same. If your gonna have one black chick, why she only gotta like white guys? Hey I’m all about doing what you want to do, and one or two season’s worth of such actions wouldn’t bother me at all. But MTV’s procedure of always putting the softest, wackest, most herbed out black guy on one of it’s premier shows, along with the subliminal message I was getting from the show (black guys are gay, or weird losers/ easy, attitude having black women go with the white guy…now!!!!) had raised my ire to the point of no return. I mean I’d been waiting for diversity within the diversity on the show for over half my life, I had quit. When I saw the sexy Latin chick tho on this years Austin TX version, I began to watch with all the focus I could muster. The flesh is weak, and while wishing to see more eyecandy, I lied to myself saying “Let me see if they finally got a regular nigga on here”. First Remote Switch: “I Want to be a Hilton” Okay maybe I caught a glimpse of Paris Hilton and thought that a new sex tape was going to be premiered, needless to say I was disappointed when I found out what the show really entailed. From what I quickly surveyed the producers comprised their cast utilizing the stereotype hand book, The young Italian guy who looks like he came straight out of a Sopranos episode, The straw chewing hick, The tell it like it is, you cant cut her from the show cuz she’s black and big, black chick, Token Asian, and the conniving white chick among others, hey I’m in. Commercial Break: My favorite simple pleasure comes on, the Miller Lite “It’s Raining Beer” ad…ahhh serenity” Back to RW: The vagueness of his character, and lack attention paid to the black guy on the show, is making my herb test hard to administer. One of the youngins on the show happens to get laid the fuck out during a drunken brawl tho, score one for peaceful resolution of conflict. Turned to NBA Daft: Niggaz betta get a new hustle cuz Europeans and other non Americans (the term foreigner is ignorant as fuck) are taking over. Quickly I realize that the only two drafts worth paying attention to are the NFL and U.S Army, when I recognized the only European names I could identify are in politics. Back to MTV: I see a commercial for “MADE” and realize the exploitation of others for entertainment will never die. The premise of a show taking someone who is the complete opposite of what they “want” to be, and laughing at there utter failure trying to reach an impossible goal, gives agnostics a point to add to their tally . Back to “I Wanna Be a Hilton” When The Apprentice became super popular, I innately thought,” people love seeing things happen to others that they would shudder to experience, and “ there’s gonna be a lot of horrible remakes”. This show encompassed both. Just because you win a contest do you think the social elite is going to accept you? Jesus people are dense. At the end of the show, you could see all the best of American ideals on display, backstabbing, manipulation, and slander. Such kind strategies where undertaken to stay in the good whims of Paris Hiltons mother? Angered at my viewing choice I took solace that it wasn’t my fault really, what was I supposed to do watch Hannity and colems? Alas experience is always a harsh teacher.
Weekly Sports and Hip Hop articles are coming ……
Peace
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