You've made me cold... In June????

You know I don’t despise Puffy.

Sure he is the poster boy for black assimilation into individualistic corporate American structure via actions ranging from, paying South American women 60 cent a hour stitch his ($70 retail) Sean John Jeans among other fine articles of wear, fleeces his artist to the point they have to rob hotel guests (Black Rob) or displaces them a area so remote that the most astute Federal Agent couldn’t unearth them, and exudes American excess such as spitting up crystal like a 3month baby who despises his/her gerber, while billions reside on earth with no running water. Even if many people can make a cogent argument that he started the downfall of Hip Hop or at least lead it to it’s current state of malaise, I still don’t hate Puffy.

So why am I referencing a person whose endurance of hate from the masses subsided in 2001? Puff despite his shortfalls is a very funny, sometimes astute man thru his music. My favorite diatribes from Diddy occur on the classic Bigge Smalls “Life After Death” cd. On the track “Long Kiss Good Night” during a drunken rant (Dame Dash you are a plagiarizer) he states:

“ your mind has control of your heart, or is its supposed to be the other way around? Your heart has control of your mind, so now I have no feelings for you, you have made me cold”

I never put much analytical thought into that statement, just boisterous laughter, until today. Maybe it was the epiphany towards the understanding of road rage, when a old man waved at me like a annoying flying pest to make a left turn, or later when a driver behind me honked there horn at me, a half of a nano second after the light turned green. Beyond the fact that these people where only acting in such a manner because A. they are protected by 2,000 pounds of machinery and B. no matter what I do in Macomb county I’ll be in the wrong, it made me think about my personality.

In the most unbiased personal assessment I can provide, I can pronounce that I’m a peaceful, truly nice individual. I’m not in the world giving the homeless the shoes off my feet, but I take great care to try make the experience of those who encounter me a pleasant one. Living in such a self created reality, why then do I encounter strife, disputes, and ignorance?

While over used some common phrases like “Taking Kindness for Weakness” hold significant relevance. I’m not above trying to knock somebody the fuck out, or sending the most confident individual dialing the suicide help line, but I try verrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry hard to refrain from doing so. But as of this moment ( well actually a few moments ago) I decided not to re-up my subscription to “Being the Bigger man Magazine” fuck that. I’m on 5’8 142 anyway; I’m just not built for it.

Instead of adhering to the phrase of the kind, I’m creating my own mantra: “Assholes create Assholes”. Like most things I conceive and share I’m fairly confident in it. Why you might ask? Well look at anger as a omnipresent transferable force that will always exist, you can do one of three things with it, A. deliver back to those who impose theirs or increase the amount already within u, B. Save your anger and displace it upon a innocent person. C. Or internalize anger which will convert into depression faster than carbs to fat.

Honesty while I’ve used option A quite often, in order to spare the feelings of others I’ve adhered to option C more than I care to imagine, and to those rare people I’ve spazzed on without warrant I’m sorry (note: if you are a option B person, you are going to go to hell if you believe in such a place). While pondering courses of action, I’ve realized that sparing others only destroys thy self.

While the person who negatively affected you is having a blissful day flying a kite or doing coke (it’s what great political leaders do) your wallowing in the misery of second guessing and regret. I chose not to embrace the lowering of my quality of life for others anymore, even at the risk of my shaky Karma.

One of the cruel facts of life is adaptation. If one doesn’t adjust to the surroundings, they will perish in a litany of ways. Our modern polity is cluttered with self centered, pompous __________. Living in such a wretched environment, I have no choice to absorb some of their qualities to survive in the areas they inhabit. Sure, I would love to be the Black Gandhi, but the American ideal of individualism has entered my being and is spreading rapidly, I gotta go for self. I can’t help it when you treat the average women with aura of respect she has a adverse reaction to it and tries to walk on u like a Foot Locker carpet, but when you treat her like shit, she will give you her kidney, or people test you like your applying for Mensa when your nice to them, but hop on ya dick when you put em in check. My uncle who I hate always said “Until you make the rules, you haft to follow them” Maybe he was right……….


“It’s just in my nature to love u, I can’t hate you, cuz it’s not in my nature to hate u, Maybe I’m Just a different type of individual,, but you have me on the line and there is a thin line between love and hate, and God forbid I cross that line, cause I’m not gonna give a fuck I’M TELLEN U RIGHT FUCKEN NOW!!!” P Diddy circa 1997



lol good ole Drunken Puff



Peace

Perception Of......

I guess that time can be taken from considerable mourning, prayer, utter disillusionment and being extremely distraught over the missing white female (blond no less)high school graduate in Aruba, to compose some updated scrolls for your consumption. You know….I think Marcia

would want us continue on with are normal lives. So in her memory or until she just magically appears like a runaway bride, I shall proceed to write.

Disclaimer: Yes I know I’m lazy. I also am aware that when somebody points out there own faults, denying you your unalienable right to criticize them, the joy of disparaging them dissipates greatly. Well I don’t apologize for that. I will say that for the 3 people that actually read my ish and the 2 who will and just don’t know it yet, I’ma step my game up. Those that are happy about said proclamation can send there thanks, to the heads of the Bush administration economy, who have so generously granted me glutinous amounts of free time, by making such inconveniences such as jobs, almost non existent.

Well since I’ve decided divulge my thoughts last nothing much has changed. Democrats are still a collective of hoes, Republicans are still intelligent thugs, scores of people perish daily in Iraq (soldiers, civilians and “insurgents”) and no body gives a fuck, and of course Black people continue to raise the bar of true art via music, with such contemporary classics as. “Gimme That Pussy” “I’m So Icey” and “Wait….till you see my d#&*”. So what is there to talk about?

Well usually I choose to discuss persons places or things (could’ve just said nouns I know) that some how seem to aggravate me. So maintaining that tradition, I choose to discuss my default religion and society’s greatest distraction, sports.

Recently there has been a lot angry diatribes directed at athletes, and the astronomical salaries they never truly will ever “earn” but yet still receive. The slanderous venom filled accusations placed upon societies role models by default include, being ungrateful, getting paid “all that money” and not doing there job, and of course my personal favorite, not respecting those that pay there salaries. In the spirit of non violence, instead of punching the next person who interrupts the sanctity my mgd while watching the game with his/her code speak, I’ll just articulate some points.

Point no.1 Your profession nothing to do with a athletes job. If your statement against professional athletes with “I only make” immediately mute your self. As much as you might try to suppress this fact, athletes are the LABOR that enables professional sports to run. Now you might to say to your self “hey I’m labor to” and if you’re really smart (and exploited) say as a enlightened Wal – Mart worker, you might say that your labor contributes to a multi billion dollar industry also. So what’s the difference? Well relying on my simple understanding of economics which states among many points that’s specialization is of high value to business. Few professions demand as much unique talent and superiority over ones peers than one in Large scale American sports. There are about roughly 8 billion plus people residing on this lovely planet of ours at the moment. Out of all the souls scratching the planets surface, precisely only 2,896 roster spots exist within the NFL, NBA, and MLB. And one only needs to watch to NBA draft and witness all kinds of players who resided from places on the globe one literally couldn’t place their finger on get drafted, to understand the earth is scoured for the best of the best. People can state that teachers, doctors, and fireman are woefully underpaid, and maybe they are, but it is infinitely easier to train a person to fill one of those positions than to graft a individual to become a professional athlete, hence the high compensation. With I all that said, I could’ve just made my point with “Until you have 20,000 to 60,000 people examine every minuscule move you perform at work, and millions vent there feeling about your job performance and of all things character through the media, keep ya asinine thoughts to yourself”.

Point. No 2. Athletes do not make to much money. While I do believe that it is a travesty of justice that a mediocre fielding 2^nd basemen who bats .236 and hits a astounding 8 homeruns a year during the steroid era to receive 6 million dollars a year, I understand why. The money has to go somewhere. In most cases nobody is gonna give you what they don’t already have. With the exception of a few sickeningly rich persons who view there sports franchise as grown up toys (like a real version of madden) most are business persons who like most captions of industry, their main focus is making a profit. Simply put, if the money wasn’t available, the owners would not pay it. The currency is out there in droves in sports business these days. If anybody should be entitled to it shouldn’t be those who make the product possible? Society has finally started to acknowledge that corporate CEO’s making ludicrous amounts of money when the companies they head are going bankrupt is sortta wrong, but think that the owners should keep all of the spoils of professional sports, I wonder why? No body cries when actors, sometimes really bad actors receive 20 million dollars plus a film that potentially will lose money , but let a athlete make 10 million when “good people are being laid off”. I coulda just said “would you really play running back in the NFL for anything less than a cool million”?

Point no.3 Be are not honest with themselves and rationale. I find it interesting when I listen to the complaints about out of control athletes, most of the talk centers around the NFL and NBA, not the NHL ( who truly doesn’t have the funds to pay out such salarys) MLB (buy most accounts the least physically demanding of the major sports). Or when the “I pay your salary and the ignorant ‘these young players are making to much money statements are arisen they also mostly are directed towards the NFL and NBA players. My theory is that people superimpose their views and feelings on sports and athletes. Sad but true, millions of people find it therapeutic to mask there jealousy and resentment and sometimes latent or overt racism through the realm of sports. If it as a established if not elaborated fact that a great deal of animus exisit between young black males and “main stream American society” why is it so hard to acknowledge in the realm of sports?

As in most endeavors of life, thinking through issues of sports usually helps bring greater clarity, so the next time you think T.O is a punk soly because he wants to renegotiate a contract that the Eagles can terminate without compensation at any time, or state the new generation of player is killen the NBA think about WHY you think and feel in that manner. Before a mgd drinker sees through ya b.s facade.